It Seems Like Years Since It's Been Clear

So let's talk about the names they give makeup. Personally, I usually love them. They're so pretty. I'm kind of disappointed when cosmetics don't have pretty names. It doesn't affect whether or not I buy them, but it's always fun.

Sometimes the name is stupid, though. Like one time I came across an Urban Decay eyeshadow called "mildew" which... actually really looks like mildew. They couldn't have chosen a slightly better name? Like fresh cut grass, or a title-y one like "Always Grows on the North Side" or something. According to Sephora, http://www.sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?id=P166063&categoryId=B70 it's one of their best-selling shades. Even though it's fug and I can't imagine any skintone it looks good on.

Last week my boyfriend and I came across a name I felt was worse. (I'll have to ask him what he thinks of mildew.)

See, it was like 4 AM in Wal*Mart (GOD I KNOW, DON'T EVEN, JUST SHUT UP, THERE WAS A GOOD REASON) and he was sleepy (justified) and I was looking at the Halloween nailpolishes, and I found a white one called "Oh Baby!" which is dumb, and a red one called "Hot Tamale" which is pretty normal, and a black one called "Kiss Me Here" which makes no damn sense at all, but sort of makes sense for a cosmetic product, I guess. And I picked up a purple one, which is very, very pretty, it's reddish purple sometimes but then sometimes totally like, navy blue purple. And awesome. So I flipped it over to look at the name.

"No Means No"

...the hell? Is this Lifetime? I told Boyfriend, who said "Are you serious?" and then "Please tell me your phone has a camera!" (It doesn't. It makes phonecalls. And that's pretty much it. Not that I care.)

I was dumbstruck. I cannot imagine who came up with this name, who signed off on it, who thought it was at all an attractive name for any kind of makeup or really anything. I mean, what about that says "purple" to you? Jesus. He and I were trying to figure it out and he eventually came over to see for himself and lamented that no one would believe us, or something. Then I realized, duhhhhh, it's for sale, morons. And only 2 bucks and really gorgeous. So I bought it. (Well, made him buy it. And a pretty pastel green BonBons itty bitty nailpolish. I'm currently wearing both, on alternating fingers. Because you care, right?)

Am I crazy? Am I the only one who thinks this is as weird a name as it is? I mean, if all the other colors had, like, Lifetime names it would make sense. It would be a weird gimmick, but okay. Not that I don't vehemently believe that no always means no, always at all times, always. But it's still really freaking weird.

Today I bought another purpleish nailpolish by the same company. It's called "Rio". Which doesn't really fit, but isn't as weird as "No Means No".

Which is less gross than Mildew.

P.S.: http://www.baricosmetics.com/product.aspx?id=552
(Gotta love "Nasty Girl" and "Excuse Me" and "Striptease") (Also, it looks absolutely nothing like that picture, at all. Like, seriously. WTF is with this company.) (Also-also, I'm currently obsessed with nailpolish. I keep buying BonBons. I'm insane.)

-8:32 PM

(Okay, watch like a hundred people commenting all THAT IS A PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE NAME WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.)

They've discontinued my very favorite pencil. http://www.abcstuff.com/items/OP026.html
The internet is unclear on whether or not the manufacturer is still making the successor product (which is black and therefore NOT THE SAME).
I only have two and one ran out of lead. I cannot write with any other writing utensil, no other pen or pencil, not charcoal or paint or my nails if I'm wearing the right nail polish.
I was just in bed writing when one of them ran out of lead and I came here to see if the company still made them; turns out, it doesn't, but it does seem to still make a similar product. I have never written with a better pencil, it's the smoothest, most comfortable writing implement I've ever used, and the eraser is heavenly, so soft and perfect. I have the funniest feeling in my stomach right now, a heaviness that's a lot like when someone dies. If I run out of lead in the second pencil- which I will- I won't be able to write anymore. The lead is kind of hard to replace, since it's very long (unlike normal mechanical pencil lead) and I don't know what I'm going to do. I definitely feel a kinship with the writer at this year's Oscars who didn't quite speak English, but blurted out a thank you to his faithful pencil. I know what he means. My two pencils are amazing and magical and without them my words wouldn't come out very well, if at all, and... I've run out of things to say.

(P.S. that was the CUTEST ACCEPTANCE SPEECH EVER, WHAT A SENSE OF HUMOR HE HAS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6K4Y8b1tHIE OMG I LOVE HIM)

(P.P.S. I'm still in writer-mode, can you tell?)

-5:06 AM